Don't Drink and Park

I was walking across East 4th Street recently, when I saw this terrible parking job:

Terrible parking job.

Not only is he on the sidewalk, not only is he in front of a fire hydrant, but he hit the fire hydrant:

Hit the fire hydrant.

East Villagers can't park.

The Bad New Days

People ask me, they say “Hey East Village Today, is it true things are returning to the the bad old days™ of yore?”

I tell them: “Of course not, silly! The conditions that brought about the bad old days of the 80s and 90s do not exist today — this is not a return to the bad old days, but is a step forward, into the bad new days!"

Behold, as seen on East 4th Street, on Halloween:

Burned out car.

Here is a view from behind:

View from behind.

Here is a view from the front:

View from the front.

It's really amazing that the flyer put under the windshield wiper blade, expressing shock and anger that the East River Park is undergoing renovation, didn't burn!

Didn't burn.

It's a miracle!

Draped Chain

I know I've written about this place before, on East 4th Street, with its dangling chain, but I can't find the post now.

Without it, this post, about how the dangling chain has moved, doesn't make as much sense.

Anyway, take a look — the chain has moved:

The chain has moved.

Here is a close-up:

Close-up.

The chain used to hang straight down, now it's draped over the railing!

It's sort of anticlimactic, without the other picture to compare it to.

#eastvillage #4thstreet #anticlimactic #chains

Or Else

East Villagers, especially East 4th Street East Villagers, are accustomed to losing their lampposts.

A couple of weeks ago, this one disappeared from in front of the beloved Roberto Clemente School:

Disappeared.

East 4th Streeters say "Bring it back, or… ELSE!"

In no time (this past Tuesday), the Department of Lampposts sent a truck to replace it — or so it seemed:

Fixing the lamppost.

They even put an orange cone on top of the stump, so no one would sit there!

When I passed by again, the next day, this is what I found:

New cement.

All of that fanfare, just to put new cement around the stump. They didn't even put it back in the right position!

It may be dark all the way down East 4th Street, at night, but they have some darn fine sidewalks!

#eastvillage #lampposts #cement #sidewalks #orangecones #4thstreet #departmentoftransportation #graffiti #else 

Bag Of Asphalt

You just never know what you're going to see when you're walking around the East Village — you might even see… a bag of asphalt!

Not just a bag of asphalt, but a well-protected bag of asphalt, like this one, on East 4th Street:

Bag of asphalt.

Where I grew up, in the Midwest, Lover's Lane was not paved, but there was a lot of asphelt!

(It's better to speak that joke than to write it.)

#eastvillage #asphalt #4thstreet

Roving Toilet Paper

A couple of weeks ago, I was walking through Tompkins Square Park, when I saw this toilet paper hanging from a tree:

Hanging from a tree.

At first, I thought it was a left-over anarchist decoration. Now, I'm not so sure!

Earlier this week, I saw what looked like the very same toilet paper, this time on East 4th Street:

On East 4th Street.

A long time ago, I saw a movie about an African immigrant living in Paris. He told a story about how back home, they believed evil spirits would inhabit inanimate objects to disguise themselves when they moved among people — even something like a plastic bag blowing by could be a spirit!

Me, I don't believe in such nonsense, but many East Villagers do. If you're one of those who do, watch out for this roving toilet paper — it might be the Devil!

#eastvillage #tompkinssquarepark #toiletpaper #4thstreet #superstition #trees

Ropa Gratis Explosion

Residents of East 4th Street awoke this past Wednesday to discover that Ropa Gratis had exploded!

Behold:

Exploded.

Later that day, a big thunderstorm passed through the area, drenching everyone and everything in its path. I wonder if this was a barometric-pressure-induced explosion?

#eastvillage #ropagratis #4thstreet

No More Dumping

Speaking of signs outside the El Jardin del Paraiso community garden, since they took down the No Dumping sign, there's been no dumping!

Behold:

Nothing dumped.

East Villagers are so oppositional!

#eastvillage #eljardindelparaiso #4thstreet #signs #oppositionaldefiantdisorder #communitygardens

New Signs

There are a couple of new signs on the fence of the El Jardin Del Paraiso community garden, on East 4th Street:

New signs.

Here is a close-up:

Close-up.

Our legacy of lead? WTF?

As if being built on a swamp wasn't bad enough!

#eastvillage #eljardindelparaiso #communitygardens #4thstreet #signs #lead

Upside-Down Tree Sign

As you know, East Villagers love trees.

So if a tree is in need of fixing, they will fix it.

Behold:

Fixed. 

Wait a minute! What's that?

Upside-down sign.

It's an upside-down sign, taped to the tree!

Let's see what it says:

What does it say?

Oh my God, that gives me vertigo!

Let me fix that.

Fixed.

There, that's better!

#eastvillage #4thstreet #scotchtape #signs #trees #vertigo

Place Invaded

This place on East 4th Street was invaded last week by this graffiti van:

Graffiti van.

Place Invaders is their name, and invading places is their game.

The name is a clever play on "Space Invaders", an old-timey video game that East Villagers played in their youth, before moving to the East Village!

Call Place Invaders, for all your place invading needs!

#eastvillage #4thstreet #vans #graffiti #placeinvaders

Yet Another Amazing Dog

Dogs in the East Village learn quickly. When they see one dog balancing its poop on a tree guard, they have to do it too!

First there was this, then this.

Now there's this, on East 4th Street Street:

Balancing dog poop.

Here is a close-up:

Close-up.

What's next from these amazing dogs?!

#eastvillage #dogpoop #4thstreet #treeguards #amazingdogs

Artsy Garbage Storage

I was walking across East 4th Street this morning, when I saw this artsy garbage storage receptacle:

Artsy.

At first, it reminded me of leopard print, but then it reminded me of avocado graffiti.

One thing I can tell you: even East Village garbage is artsy!

#eastvillage #4thstreet #garbagestorage #graffiti

Strange & Wonderful Things

Not only miracles occur in the East Village, but other types of strange and wonderful things, too.

This ice pile on East 4th Street seems to have formed by itself, being located near no bars nor restaurants:

Naturally-forming ice pile.

On East 10th Street, locals can offer no explanation for this water draining away from a mound of salt pellets:

Water from salt.

Maybe we should be called The East Village Zone?

#eastvillage #ice #4thstreet #salt #steps

Yet Another Miracle

If you're crippled and can't walk, you owe it to yourself to make a trip to East 4th Street, where the blind receive sight, the lame walk, those who have leprosy are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, etc.

One month ago to this day, I wrote about the aftermath of a miracle that took place here.

This morning, I beheld another such aftermath.

Behold:

Newly-abandoned crutches.

I'm not sure how keen I am about the dead being raised, though. I've seen Walking Dead.

If you're dead, you should stay away from East 4th Street.

You shouldn't even be reading this blog!

#eastvillage #4thstreet #crutches #miracles #walkingdead

Painting In The Rain

If you're a regular reader of East Village Today, you might think from recent posts that it's been raining steadily here.

It has — 39 days and 39 nights!

Here is a picture of a painting in the rain, on East 4th Street:

Painting in the rain.

Here is a close-up, on its side:

Close-up on its side.

One East Villager's old homestead is another East Villager's abandoned painting in the rain…

#eastvillage #4thstreet #abandonedpaintings #paintings #rain

The Bicycle Family Is No More

Speaking of bicycle parking, the bicycle family that once lived on East 4th Street is gone, now just a distant memory.

A distant memory.

#eastvillage #bicycles #4thstreet

Graffiti Boy

Back in February, I was walking across East 4th Street, just past First Avenue, when I saw this scene of a graffiti boy and his graffiti:

Graffiti boy.

He looked pretty young to be a graffitier, but this is the East Village after all!

He didn't hang around for very long though:

Graffiti boy gone.

At least he left us with his artwork, to remember him by!

#eastvillage #graffiti #4thstreet #firstavenue

Tracks

I was walking across East 4th Street recently, past the Village View Apartments, when I saw these tracks in the dirt:

Tracks in the dirt.

Wait a minute, what's that?!

A syringe.

It's a syringe!

East Village junkies have tracks too.

#eastvillage #syringes #dirt #4thstreet #villageviewapartments

Fallen Bird Nest

Spring in the East Village is a time for bird nests to fall.

Here is one example, seen on East 4th Street this past Tuesday:

Fallen bird nest.

I suspect the eggs were devoured by an egg-sucking dog.

#eastvillage #birdnests #4thstreet #spring